You walk this road every day. You look forward. Never right, never left. Everyone says there is danger lurking there. But does anyone look to see what it really is? Is it really there at all? Things are not always what they seem.
You are doing good things. You are living the life you’ve always been told to live. Could anything go wrong? One day you look to your left, just to see what is there. There sits a big, soft, teddy bear. There is no danger. He smiles at you and you feel warm and invited. Now each day when you come walking you stop for a visit. Longer and longer these visits last. Closer and closer you get to him.
After one visit you walk along when you realize that everything has changed. Your blue sky and green grass grows dark and black around you. There is nothing left. Just black. Just dark. Just fear. You look behind you, he is there. But no longer is he inviting. Once soft and cuddly. Now dense and putrid. You run through the dark. You run and run and run. Nothing changes no matter how much you want it to. Only dark, black, fear remains.
You cannot breath. You gasp for air. You are being smothered by the dark. You hear the thumping footsteps of the monster behind you. The ground trembles under its weight. You dare not turn and look at it again. You can feel its hot breath down your neck. You can feel the moist, slimy, drool and who know what else, curling around your feet as you run.
You gag. The awful stench surrounds you. Why did you come? Why did you not leave when you had the chance? Will you live? Will you ever get out? You do not know. You cannot tell. Tears wet your face. The monster growls, the ground shakes, you fall to your knees. The monster is upon you. Yet somehow you struggle out from under it. You are bleeding and bruised. But you are alive!
Run. You run. Still the monster chases you. It will never give up. But can you keep going? You don’t know the way out. Its claws have left gashes. Teeth have penetrated your skin. Its coarse hair has bloodied your face. It’s foul saliva has infected your wounds.
You fall. It attacks. You are the victor for a moment. You run and fall again and again and again. Suddenly you hit a wall. You lean against it, breathing hard. Sweat and tears sting your oozing flesh. But you hear something. Laughter! Real, heartwarming laughter. Freedom is on the other side.
How do you get in? You look for a door, a window, anything. You find none. You wonder where your monster has gone. Then you see it. Swallowing down what was once a person. You tremble violently as you watch it swallow the last remaining bit of human flesh, blood dripping from the corners of its mouth.
You look up at the wall and you see light. Small, hope giving light. You look back at the monster. You want freedom, but do you want to change? You look at the monster. It sees you. It charges. Your hands are on the wall. You climb, you scale, you slip. You catch yourself. You climb, you slip. Again you are safe. Over and over you narrowly escape. Then it happens….
As you fall, you see the monster, its jaws open wide, a malicious look in its red eyes. You shed a tear, you have lost. It has won.
You stop falling.
The monster gets smaller and smaller. The light grows ever brighter. You look up, and a glowing white face is holding your hand, pulling you up to safety. You let yourself be helped. You realize that your friends were all around you, trying to save you. But you did not listen to their pleading calls to come back. And they would not venture out and attempt to kill the monster. Those who did, never returned.
They were always there. Ready to help you if you would but let them. And in your greatest need, they gave the final push. You come to the other side. You are clean, white, fresh. No more darkness. No more sin. Only life, love, and happiness. The monster is there, on the darker side of the wall. At times you think of the teddy bear you thought it was. You remember the horror you lived through for so long. You help others over the wall, just as you were helped. When you walk you never look left or right. You just walk forward. Someday you know you will come to the end and you will be truly happy with the peace and love you will find waiting there.
Missy Nelson
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